Held, Not Fixed: Infertility, Pregnancy Loss, motherhood and the Power of Being Seen

Glacier Counselling
4 days ago
2 min read

Infertility and pregnancy loss can have a profound impact on mental health yet many people move through these experiences feeling alone. I was recently honoured to take the stage to speak about these issues and share my story for She Speaks- Courageous Conversations that Change Everything.

In this talk, I share my personal story of infertility, high-risk pregnancy, loss, and motherhood alongside reflections on the importance of community, connection, and being

truly supported in life’s hardest moments.

We often live in a culture that leans toward fixing, offering solutions, reframes, or a sense that we need to “move forward” in a certain way. But in my work as a therapist, and in my own lived experience, I’ve seen something different: healing often begins not when we are fixed, but when we are held.

The Mental Health Impact of Infertility and Loss

Research has shown us the the mental health impact of infertility is similar to that of a new cancer diagnoses. Experiences like infertility, pregnancy complications, and loss can bring grief, anxiety, isolation, and identity shifts that are difficult to put into words. And yet, many people feel pressure to keep these experiences private or minimized.

Research continues to show that naming and sharing our experiences can reduce shame and foster connection. When we speak openly about reproductive struggles and maternal mental health, we create space for others to feel less alone and more understood.

Why Sharing Our Stories Matters

There is something powerful about being witnessed in our truth.

When we allow ourselves to speak vulnerably, whether in therapy, in community, or in trusted relationships, we begin to soften the weight of what we’re carrying. Our stories become a bridge, connecting us to others who may be quietly navigating similar paths.

This isn’t about oversharing or forcing vulnerability. It’s about creating spaces where honesty is welcomed, and where people feel safe enough to be seen.

You Don’t Have to Be Fixed

If you are navigating infertility, pregnancy loss, or a difficult season in motherhood, you are not alone.

You don’t need to have the answers. You don’t need to move through it in a certain way. You don’t need to be “fixed” to be worthy of care and support.

You deserve to be held in it.